"A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken." Ecclesiastes 4:12
Friday, February 27, 2009
Day 6 ~ Disney Magic
We got up early this morning and headed to Animal Kingdom for breakfast with Donald at 8:25 am. It was nice to get into the park before it opened and we were lucky enough to have Daisy, Goofy and Mickey join in the breakfast celebration also. The kids had a lot of fun and we all had a very good meal. After breakfast, we spent some time in Dinoworld, went on a couple of rides and then went to catch the Nemo musical. It started to get pretty warm (80 degrees I think) and we were all a little tired so we decided to head back to our room and take a little nap. After a short nap for everyone, we had lunch and went swimming and played on the beach. It was nice to just have a lazy kind of day and the kids really enjoyed just being able to play for a while. We changed clothes and then went to Magic Kingdom for the last couple hours and E really wanted to see the fireworks at the Castle. As we were walking down Main Street Disney, K told Jon that he could feel the magic and wanted to know if Jon could too. We went on a couple of rides and did the Monsters Inc Laugh Factory and K really enjoyed it. E was put up on the screen and was supposed to play peek-a-boo but she didn’t move. It was pretty funny and the kids had a great time with many laughs. We did the Small World ride one more time and then headed to watch the fireworks. K and A were all set with ear plugs as they did not want to hear the loud noise from the Fireworks. After the fireworks, we headed back to the hotel, got a late night snack (Mickey Mouse Ice Cream Cookie’s around…..for the kids). It was fun to sit with the five of us on the bed in our hotel room eating our late night snacks, hanging out and talking about all the fun things we have seen and done this week! The kids just got their teeth brushed and in bed at 10:30. We are all having a wonderful time and it is so much fun to just spend the day with the kids and do whatever.
Thursday, February 26, 2009
Day 5- Disney Magic
Today we met up with our friends the T’s and we headed over to the Magic Kingdom. We rode the Disney Railroad Train and we got off at the Toon Town so we could explore this area. While the boys were playing in Pooh Land, I decided to take the girls into the building where we were told the princess’s were located. There was a long line to meet the fairies but the line for the princesses was not that long. I had no idea what we were getting ourselves into but we decided to wait. After a short period of time we were led back into a room where there was Cinderella, Belle, and Sleeping Beauty. It was awesome. The girls were star struck with the princesses and they were both shaking and had a hard time talking. The princesses were all so very sweet and wanted to know all about them. When Cinderella asked if they were twins, the girls replied that they were triplets and that their brother was hanging out with Daddy. Belle told the girls to tell K that he should come for a visit too because “she does not bite”. Jon was bummed he missed it but I did get some fun pictures so that was good. It was a very sweet moment for the girls and mom too! After that we headed over to Adventure land to check out the jungle ride and have some ice cream. We also checked out the big tree house it was very cool. We decided to head back to the hotel to do a little swimming and have some lunch. It was a much needed relaxing afternoon for us after the big day yesterday. The kids had fun in the pool and playing in the sand. I enjoyed catching some rays and it felt a little sweeter knowing that there was a big snow storm back at home. Ha!
Tonight we headed to Downtown Disney so we could check that out. It was fun but I think we will focus our last two days on visiting more of the Magic Kingdom, Epcot, and Animal Kingdom in the morning for breakfast with Donald. Everyone here is sound asleep so I am signing off to do the same. We will not have Internet access now until we get home so we will update then.
Tonight we headed to Downtown Disney so we could check that out. It was fun but I think we will focus our last two days on visiting more of the Magic Kingdom, Epcot, and Animal Kingdom in the morning for breakfast with Donald. Everyone here is sound asleep so I am signing off to do the same. We will not have Internet access now until we get home so we will update then.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Day 4 ~ Disney Magic
MARATHON!!!!!! Today was the first day that we used the strollers and it was a good thing. The kids made it all day and never once were upset about how much we were doing or that they wanted to go back to the hotel. We started at Magic Kingdom when they opened at 9:00 am, went to Epcot after lunch and got back to the room at 10:15 pm. The trio did awesome, they were great sports about our adventure. As stated, we started at the Magic Kingdom when they opened. We really lucked out because we got there just in time for one of Mickey’s shows at the Castle. We watched (and video taped) the show and then went on a few rides (race cars, Mickey’s 3D Magic show, Winnie the Pooh and Snow White’s ride, oh….and don’t forget the Tea Cups…). We were all pretty hungry so we decided to have lunch and Kendrick ate so fast and drank so much water that he ended up getting sick. Luckily it was not the flu and was just anxiety and fast eating. All was well and we decided to make a run to Epcot. On our way out we ran into Daisy Duck and of course had to stop and say “hi”.
We got to Epcot and went in the big ball (which is really a ride into space….time travel is pretty cool and we all got a glimpse into how easy life will be in the future).
After the space ride we went to the Finding Nemo part of the park. We went on the ride to find Nemo and then got to see “Crush” the most coolest turtle in the world duuuuuddddde……. That was a lot of fun for all of us! After Crush we decided it was time to tour the world, so we strolled through the rest of planet Earth and stopped in Germany for some good cold beer.
We finished our tour of the world and went back to Japan for dinner at a Teppan Edo’s, where they cook the food right in front of you. The kids weren’t really into it and we are not sure if it is because they don’t like that kind of food or because they were already full from the treats that Grandma A was buying during the day (most likely the second choice). The trio really enjoyed watching the cook and K was even flirting a little bit as she prepared his meal. After dinner we went on the Soaring ride. It was a blast, but Jon and K had a little adversity to deal with because K decided at the last minute he needed to go to the bathroom, so Jon took him and we decided to all meet up after the ride. Well, it was AWESOME…..Grandma, Grandpa, Nicole, A, and E went together and Jon and K went together. K was ready and willing, and actually looking forward to it because it was going to be just like flying, or as daddy put it “just like jumping from one bed to the other in the hotel room only for a lot longer”. As Jon and K got to the front of the line (second time) K started to get nervous again. He was really worried because he didn’t want to get sore and it was then that Jon figured out that he was afraid he would get hurt because the name of the ride was “Soaring” and he thought that was the same as “soaring” or being sore from something. Let me tell you, trying to explain the English language to a 4 year old is extremely complex, but in the long run, all was well and we all had a great experience on the ride. After that we got ready for the laser and fireworks show. It was great, the kids had fun, got a couple of toys and most importantly stayed awake for the show.We are sad to see Grandma and Grandpa leave tomorrow as it really has been a lot of fun with them. They spoil the kids (and parents) rotten and we will miss the extra hands. However, we are going to get together with our good friends the T’s for the day and the kids are really looking forward that. Not sure how early we will wake tomorrow, but I have a feeling that we won't make the extra hours in Magic Kingdom starting at 8 am. “Have a Magical Day”
We got to Epcot and went in the big ball (which is really a ride into space….time travel is pretty cool and we all got a glimpse into how easy life will be in the future).
After the space ride we went to the Finding Nemo part of the park. We went on the ride to find Nemo and then got to see “Crush” the most coolest turtle in the world duuuuuddddde……. That was a lot of fun for all of us! After Crush we decided it was time to tour the world, so we strolled through the rest of planet Earth and stopped in Germany for some good cold beer.
We finished our tour of the world and went back to Japan for dinner at a Teppan Edo’s, where they cook the food right in front of you. The kids weren’t really into it and we are not sure if it is because they don’t like that kind of food or because they were already full from the treats that Grandma A was buying during the day (most likely the second choice). The trio really enjoyed watching the cook and K was even flirting a little bit as she prepared his meal. After dinner we went on the Soaring ride. It was a blast, but Jon and K had a little adversity to deal with because K decided at the last minute he needed to go to the bathroom, so Jon took him and we decided to all meet up after the ride. Well, it was AWESOME…..Grandma, Grandpa, Nicole, A, and E went together and Jon and K went together. K was ready and willing, and actually looking forward to it because it was going to be just like flying, or as daddy put it “just like jumping from one bed to the other in the hotel room only for a lot longer”. As Jon and K got to the front of the line (second time) K started to get nervous again. He was really worried because he didn’t want to get sore and it was then that Jon figured out that he was afraid he would get hurt because the name of the ride was “Soaring” and he thought that was the same as “soaring” or being sore from something. Let me tell you, trying to explain the English language to a 4 year old is extremely complex, but in the long run, all was well and we all had a great experience on the ride. After that we got ready for the laser and fireworks show. It was great, the kids had fun, got a couple of toys and most importantly stayed awake for the show.We are sad to see Grandma and Grandpa leave tomorrow as it really has been a lot of fun with them. They spoil the kids (and parents) rotten and we will miss the extra hands. However, we are going to get together with our good friends the T’s for the day and the kids are really looking forward that. Not sure how early we will wake tomorrow, but I have a feeling that we won't make the extra hours in Magic Kingdom starting at 8 am. “Have a Magical Day”
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Day 3 ~ Disney Magic
We are still alive and kick’ in down here in Disney World. We realize that here at Disney everything shuts down early for good reason. We are all so beat by the end of the day. Today we headed over to Animal Kingdom. We went on the Kilimanjaro Safari ride twice! Jon and I also enjoyed the Bugs life 3D show that takes place inside the tree of life. It was really cool and kind of spooky so we were glad that we left the kids to be with Grandma while we went. Oh yeah and when we got out of the show Grandma was in the gift shop shopping with the kids!!!! After that Bugs life show we headed over to Dino land and we rode a few rides but then it was time to head back to the hotel as Grandpa Al had already arrived. Once we got back to the hotel the kids went running when they saw Grandpa. They were so excited that he was here. We joked that he got a better reception that Mickey Mouse.
Once we had a chance to relax a little at the hotel it was time to get ready for our dinner with Cinderella. The girls each brought a princess dress along so we dolled them up and headed over to dinner. We were thrilled that Grandma and Grandpa joined us for dinner too. It was a magical dinner and it was so fun to watch K and the girls get smitten with Cinderella, Prince Charming, the Evil Step Mother, and of course the Fairy God Mother. The food wasn’t all that bad either.
After dinner we decided it was time to head back to the hotel as Grandma and Grandpa had a room with a view for Fire Works. We all relaxed and the kids got their PJ’s on so they were ready for the fireworks. It was the perfect set up but we did promise the kids that one of these nights we would sit out on the beach or at the park and watch the fireworks in all of their glory. We now have three sleeping children and plans to awake by 7:30 AM so we can head over to the Magic Kingdom and then Epcot Center for another full day of magical memory making tomorrow. “Have a Magical Day”
Once we had a chance to relax a little at the hotel it was time to get ready for our dinner with Cinderella. The girls each brought a princess dress along so we dolled them up and headed over to dinner. We were thrilled that Grandma and Grandpa joined us for dinner too. It was a magical dinner and it was so fun to watch K and the girls get smitten with Cinderella, Prince Charming, the Evil Step Mother, and of course the Fairy God Mother. The food wasn’t all that bad either.
After dinner we decided it was time to head back to the hotel as Grandma and Grandpa had a room with a view for Fire Works. We all relaxed and the kids got their PJ’s on so they were ready for the fireworks. It was the perfect set up but we did promise the kids that one of these nights we would sit out on the beach or at the park and watch the fireworks in all of their glory. We now have three sleeping children and plans to awake by 7:30 AM so we can head over to the Magic Kingdom and then Epcot Center for another full day of magical memory making tomorrow. “Have a Magical Day”
Monday, February 23, 2009
Day 2 ~ Disney Magic
We were lucky enough today to sleep in. K did not roll out of bed until almost 9:30 AM! He along with all of us were so tired. We had a slow start today getting to the parks but we finally made it to Hollywood Studios around 11 AM. We walked in to see Pluto signing autographs so we got in line with our new autograph books so we could get his signature. We then got in line to greet Minnie Mouse but she went on break and much to K’s delight we got to get Goofy’s signature instead. After this we headed over to our Character lunch meal. We ate with JoJo and the lion from JoJo’s Circus, and Leo and June of the Little Einstein’s. This meal was a lot of fun because the kids got to get up and dance with the characters, get autographs, and they even did the cha cha around the restaurant with the characters. This was our first of many character meals during our stay and it went well.
After our lunch we headed over to the Muppet’s 3D show. We had a blast. It was great technology and we all enjoyed it. We stayed at the park for the Block Party Blast with the characters. This was a very lively show with lots of dancers and characters. The kids loved it and they even got up and danced. Jon missed the party because we left the video camera at the gift shop so he had to track back to get it. Luckily we found it again at the gift shop!
After Hollywood Studios we headed back to the hotel to do a little swimming. It was very windy and cool so that did not last long. We ate pizza in our room tonight and then headed back over to the Magic Kingdom to watch fireworks and see the Lights parade. We were lucky enough to get on the ride “It’s a Small World” and it was by far the favorite of the group thus far. That sums up today. It was another magical day here at Disney World. I am signing off so I can get to bed like the rest of the family. “Have a Magical Day”.
Sunday, February 22, 2009
Day 1 ~ Disney Magic
We made it!!! Today was a long day of travel and we even had an hour and half delay with our airplane but these kids were troopers through it all. I will never forget the excitement of pulling into the gates of Disney and the people on the Disney Magical Bus erupting into cheers. The kids were literally bouncing off the bus walls, as they were so excited to finally be at Disney World!
I have to say that everyone we talked to about Disney was right because this just might be the “happiest place on earth”! All of the staff has been so helpful and friendly.
The room is nice and spacious and we are on the monorail so that makes life so much easier. We ate dinner tonight at the Wave as we were all ready for a real meal. This allowed the adults to have a cocktail and the kids got kiddie cocktails with fun light up characters on them.
After dinner we headed over to the Magic Kingdom and we just missed the fireworks display. They each got a glow in the dark Mickey Mouse sword (thanks to Grandma M) and then we headed to Fantasy Land so we could ride the Tea Cups. We took one ride in the cups and then we were in line for the Dumbo ride and K was so tired he almost fell asleep on Jon’s shoulder. We decided we would head back to the room so we could all get some much-needed rest.
Once we got back to the room, the kids got their 2nd wind or should I say their 82nd wind of the day and they had a dance party in their new jammies. They finally crashed just a few minutes ago and now we are sitting here enjoying the silence. I can say that we are all so excited to be here and we are so glad that Grandma M is with us too because it is nice to have one adult to one child.
I vow to update each day (however publish sparingly since it is extra $ for internet service) so we can document our entire trip here at the Happiest Place on Earth! As they say around here…”have a Magical Day”
Thursday, February 19, 2009
I AM NOT A ROOKIE!
This is the phrase that my Personal Trainer that I just started working with said to me over and over. Every time he said it, I felt more empowered by my strength and ability. Just after the Holidays, I decided to take advantage of a package deal for some personal training at the Gym I work out at.
I have been dedicated to working out for as long as I can remember. I have always been very conscious about eating right and working out and now I am at a point where if I don't get my work out in, then I get a little cranky and then Jon reminds me to get to the gym. I would not say that I am addicted to working out but I would say that I do need it for the endorphins it releases and how great it makes me feel.
Hearing from the personal trainer that I am not a rookie has helped me to realize that all the hard work I have put into working out has paid off. I am stronger than I gave myself credit. That feels great. I just purchased some more sessions from Jim as I really like how he has helped me turn my work outs around. I have a new energy now when I head to the gym and with all the stress I have had lately that is just what I need. As the famous phrase goes..."I am here to Pump You Up"!
I have been dedicated to working out for as long as I can remember. I have always been very conscious about eating right and working out and now I am at a point where if I don't get my work out in, then I get a little cranky and then Jon reminds me to get to the gym. I would not say that I am addicted to working out but I would say that I do need it for the endorphins it releases and how great it makes me feel.
Hearing from the personal trainer that I am not a rookie has helped me to realize that all the hard work I have put into working out has paid off. I am stronger than I gave myself credit. That feels great. I just purchased some more sessions from Jim as I really like how he has helped me turn my work outs around. I have a new energy now when I head to the gym and with all the stress I have had lately that is just what I need. As the famous phrase goes..."I am here to Pump You Up"!
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
A New Smile!
The surgery went well! I was very impressed with the surgery center and all the staff that helped us out that day. They were so good with K and really put him at ease. The nurse told K that the doctor would use magic to get his tooth out. The doctor put me at ease about the way they would help K fall asleep and I was even there until he fell asleep. It was not all that hard to watch and he was only out for about 5-10 minutes. I was amazed at how fast it all went. K was groggy after the procedure and complained of a tummy ache but we soon realized that he was hungry and it had nothing to do with his tooth removal. It took him about an hour to get back to normal but then it was like nothing had happened. The Dr said that it would be a good two years before his tooth will grow in. He said that was disappointing as far as pictures go but I told him it was just part of the story. I think his new smile is kind of cute. He was very brave and for that I am thankful. Now we don't have to worry about that tooth anymore.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Oral Surgery Update
K did well with his surgery this morning. Thanks for all the prayers. I am wiped out tonight so I will post more tomorrow about how it all went and I also have some photos for everyone to see his new look. God Bless.
Monday, February 16, 2009
Beautiful Boy...
Tomorrow my sweet little boy is going to have his first experience with Surgery. We are headed to the Oral Surgeon so K can have his front tooth removed. He chipped it last spring when he fell off his trike. They told us that the day might come where we would have to have it removed but we were hoping that since it was a baby tooth it would just fall out on its own. So tomorrow, K, Grandma, and myself are off for K to have his first surgery. I am a little nervous about having him go "under" but so many people have assured me that this is safe.
We are praying that tomorrow goes smoothly and that K has little to no pain from the procedure. Tonight as he was giving the girls their kisses goodnight, he told me "I am really going to miss my girls tomorrow mommy". Sooo cute. He is excited to get his tooth in a jar so he can show daddy. He is also excited for the Tooth Fairy to come and he told Jon "Then I will have more money than you daddy"! I will post how it all goes tomorrow. Until then, keep up all in your prayers...especially K.
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Monday, February 09, 2009
A Visit with Duggy
This past weekend we headed up north to visit our family. Grandma C and Grandpa R and Aunt L, Uncle C, and Cousins E and Em. It was a fun visit and the kids really enjoy hanging out with their cousins. K likes to get tips from E on the Wii and E and A like to play with cousin Em because she is older and they love that.
On Friday night Jon and I met up with some of his friends and it was great to catch up with them too. Saturday I woke up not feeling so hot and I still don't feel that great so that was a bummer. I am sure I have the touch of the flu like everyone else had a few weeks back. Luckily it is a good time for me to be down and out if that needed to happen.
We were going to stay in Fargo until today but the weather was supposed to be bad so we decided to head back yesterday instead to be on the safe side.
While we were in Fargo, we decided to go to the Air Museum. We have been there before but this time there seemed to be more airplanes and stuff to check out. The kids LOVED it and they were so excited. Their favorite was Duggy the airplane that you can climb into and check out. They went in and out of Duggy over and over and over again. There was also another small plane, a helicopter, and an old Army jeep that they could sit in. When we first arrived at the museum we were greeted by one of the workers there. She asked K where he was from and he sheepishly turned around and said "these guys" as he pointed to Jon and I. We all had a good laugh over this one. It was cute. I am happy to report that we all had a great time at the museum but it is safe to say that I a long trip in a small plane like this would never work. WOW...it was tight in that plane with two people.
It was a relaxing weekend of hanging out with family and catching up. Thanks Grandma C and Grandpa R for hosting all of us. The kids are anxious to try out the web cam. The kids did great and K was so sad to leave he cried. Poor little guy. He hates good bye's just like me.
On Friday night Jon and I met up with some of his friends and it was great to catch up with them too. Saturday I woke up not feeling so hot and I still don't feel that great so that was a bummer. I am sure I have the touch of the flu like everyone else had a few weeks back. Luckily it is a good time for me to be down and out if that needed to happen.
We were going to stay in Fargo until today but the weather was supposed to be bad so we decided to head back yesterday instead to be on the safe side.
While we were in Fargo, we decided to go to the Air Museum. We have been there before but this time there seemed to be more airplanes and stuff to check out. The kids LOVED it and they were so excited. Their favorite was Duggy the airplane that you can climb into and check out. They went in and out of Duggy over and over and over again. There was also another small plane, a helicopter, and an old Army jeep that they could sit in. When we first arrived at the museum we were greeted by one of the workers there. She asked K where he was from and he sheepishly turned around and said "these guys" as he pointed to Jon and I. We all had a good laugh over this one. It was cute. I am happy to report that we all had a great time at the museum but it is safe to say that I a long trip in a small plane like this would never work. WOW...it was tight in that plane with two people.
It was a relaxing weekend of hanging out with family and catching up. Thanks Grandma C and Grandpa R for hosting all of us. The kids are anxious to try out the web cam. The kids did great and K was so sad to leave he cried. Poor little guy. He hates good bye's just like me.
Wednesday, February 04, 2009
Sunday, February 01, 2009
Heaven on Earth
Someone sent the following to me in an email. I really appreciate what this woman has to say about having triplets. I like the comment about feeling alone and weird at times. People really say the weirdest things to us. One time a woman told me as she stared at my triplet stroller "That is just disgusting"! WOW! The other day we were leaving the gym and an older man was walking out with us. He asked me if the girls were twins. I told him they were two of three that I have Triplets. He said, "boy I thought I had it bad with twins" I then told him that we really feel blessed to have three healthy children. He then summed it up like this "the first 9 months we were scratching our heads and asking God "Why Us", from 9 months on it was pure heaven on earth"! This is absolutely true. We would not do it any other way. I am posting what is below to raise some awareness of being respectful of Higher order multiple families and their privacy. My kids are now at an age where they can understand what people are asking and saying about us. They are very proud to be triplets and I always bring them into the conversation with inquiring public now because I want them to continue to be proud of being a triplet. I think also makes the "public" more aware of what they are saying and how they are acting about the Higher Order Multiple factor.
I've been thinking a lot lately about the attention we receive while out with the boys. I've understood for quite some time that there is this intense fascination with higher order multiples. I'm not sure if some of the new television shows, like "John and Kate plus 8" have fueled the interest. Perhaps the rarity of it all is what attracts people to us.
I've been wrestling with how to respond to the many people who approach us. One of my newest concerns is what my boys will learn from me when I do respond.
There are so many things that the general public just doesn't understand about having multiples. We get asked the same things all the time. Here is my best attempt at debunking some of the most common myths about our multiples. Enjoy.
1. Families with multiples receive help. I'm referring to two types of help: financial and help in the way of childcare. We've had many people ask what kind of assistance we get from the government. None. In our state/county, only families that live beneath the poverty level can receive aid in the way of health care, groceries and formula. We happen to live in the county with the second highest median income in the country. The median income in our county is 98K. To be considered living in poverty, a family of 5 cannot earn more than 18K. The financial burden of having triplets (or more) is heavy. Many families with multiples take on this burden alone.
I will say that there are some great companies that sent us free samples and coupons. It was very helpful. Unlike what you sometimes see on television, we did not receive a lifetime supply of diapers or any other item. We were also incredibly fortunate to be showered with beautiful gifts from our families, friends and coworkers.
I also get asked all the time what kind of childcare help we have. Lots of people also ask if either of our parents have moved in with us. While I do know families who have done one or both of these, we have have neither. We sacrificed my salary so that I could stay at home with the boys. While this is a very demanding job, help in the way of a nanny would be incredibly expensive. As for an au pair, we just don't have the room in our home. We have no family living close by. There is also a pride issue involved here. What kind of mother would I be if I could not care for my own children? While logically I can accept that I do need occasional help, I have a very hard time letting go.
2. The biology of it all: If I remember correctly I learned all about the conception of a human in ninth grade biology. Either people don't remember this or they get confused when more than one baby is born at a time.
Identical multiples have the same DNA. One egg. One sperm. The embryo splits. Depending on when the embryo splits, the babies may or may not have their own amniotic sacs. Identical twinning is completely random.
Fraternal identical do not have identical DNA. Each baby was conceived with it's own egg and sperm. (That doesn't sound right, but you get the point.) Fraternal babies have their own amniotic sac.
They can all be identical. They can all be fraternal. You can have a mixture of both identical and fraternal.
I have also been asked on more than one occasion: "Are they all the same?" I don't always understand what this means. Each of my boys is his own unique individual. They have different personalities, likes and dislikes.
3. All multiples were conceived by means of fertility treatments. First of all, this is not true. Spontaneous multiples do happen. Secondly, it's not appropriate to ask. Most importantly, it makes no difference at all.
4. We were "trying" to have triplets. While we often joke about having sex three times in one night, no one can "try" to have triplets. Even those of us who have undergone some sort of fertility treatment NEVER intended to conceive multiples. There is no way any fertility clinic would try to help a couple conceive triplets or more. It's dangerous. It's risky. It's bad for their statistics.
5. It's okay to point, stare, gawk and comment at families who are out with their multiples. I would never dream of pointing at a person in a wheelchair and saying, "Look boys, that lady can't walk!" I would never say out loud in public, "Wow. That man is bald. He must have cancer. Poor thing." Surely if I went around town running my mouth like this, I would get attacked. Maybe shot. For some reason, the basic rules of common courtesy are thrown out the window when we take the boys out.
6. What really happens in a multiple pregnancy: Few realize the toll a triplet pregnancy takes on a woman's body (and mental health). Yes our bellies get much bigger. Our pregnancies are often void of joy. Very early on, many of us were asked to reduce or terminate our pregnancies.
Our pregnancies are huge emotional roller coasters. We worry daily if our babies will be born too prematurely. We worry about cord entanglement, twin to twin transfusion, intrauterine growth restriction, gestational diabetes, pre eclampsia, pre term labor, extreme prematurity, premature rupture of membranes, birth defects. . .the list could go on forever.
Most of us suffer the pain and heartache of having three babies in the NICU. We spend weeks, and sometimes months, on bed rest. We travel back and forth between our homes and the hospital trying to be a mommy to three babies living in two different places. We try to protect our preemies from RSV and other dangerous germs.
Our bodies struggle to function again. Our skin stretches beyond your imagination. We have stretch marks in places that we never knew possible. We have aches and pains that last for months (sometimes longer).
We cry because no one understands. We grieve over the pregnancy we didn't have. We have days filled with guilt because we feel like there just isn't enough Mommy to go around.
With time, love, and support we begin to heal. We learn to rejoice for the miracles we've been given.
I've been thinking a lot lately about the attention we receive while out with the boys. I've understood for quite some time that there is this intense fascination with higher order multiples. I'm not sure if some of the new television shows, like "John and Kate plus 8" have fueled the interest. Perhaps the rarity of it all is what attracts people to us.
I've been wrestling with how to respond to the many people who approach us. One of my newest concerns is what my boys will learn from me when I do respond.
There are so many things that the general public just doesn't understand about having multiples. We get asked the same things all the time. Here is my best attempt at debunking some of the most common myths about our multiples. Enjoy.
1. Families with multiples receive help. I'm referring to two types of help: financial and help in the way of childcare. We've had many people ask what kind of assistance we get from the government. None. In our state/county, only families that live beneath the poverty level can receive aid in the way of health care, groceries and formula. We happen to live in the county with the second highest median income in the country. The median income in our county is 98K. To be considered living in poverty, a family of 5 cannot earn more than 18K. The financial burden of having triplets (or more) is heavy. Many families with multiples take on this burden alone.
I will say that there are some great companies that sent us free samples and coupons. It was very helpful. Unlike what you sometimes see on television, we did not receive a lifetime supply of diapers or any other item. We were also incredibly fortunate to be showered with beautiful gifts from our families, friends and coworkers.
I also get asked all the time what kind of childcare help we have. Lots of people also ask if either of our parents have moved in with us. While I do know families who have done one or both of these, we have have neither. We sacrificed my salary so that I could stay at home with the boys. While this is a very demanding job, help in the way of a nanny would be incredibly expensive. As for an au pair, we just don't have the room in our home. We have no family living close by. There is also a pride issue involved here. What kind of mother would I be if I could not care for my own children? While logically I can accept that I do need occasional help, I have a very hard time letting go.
2. The biology of it all: If I remember correctly I learned all about the conception of a human in ninth grade biology. Either people don't remember this or they get confused when more than one baby is born at a time.
Identical multiples have the same DNA. One egg. One sperm. The embryo splits. Depending on when the embryo splits, the babies may or may not have their own amniotic sacs. Identical twinning is completely random.
Fraternal identical do not have identical DNA. Each baby was conceived with it's own egg and sperm. (That doesn't sound right, but you get the point.) Fraternal babies have their own amniotic sac.
They can all be identical. They can all be fraternal. You can have a mixture of both identical and fraternal.
I have also been asked on more than one occasion: "Are they all the same?" I don't always understand what this means. Each of my boys is his own unique individual. They have different personalities, likes and dislikes.
3. All multiples were conceived by means of fertility treatments. First of all, this is not true. Spontaneous multiples do happen. Secondly, it's not appropriate to ask. Most importantly, it makes no difference at all.
4. We were "trying" to have triplets. While we often joke about having sex three times in one night, no one can "try" to have triplets. Even those of us who have undergone some sort of fertility treatment NEVER intended to conceive multiples. There is no way any fertility clinic would try to help a couple conceive triplets or more. It's dangerous. It's risky. It's bad for their statistics.
5. It's okay to point, stare, gawk and comment at families who are out with their multiples. I would never dream of pointing at a person in a wheelchair and saying, "Look boys, that lady can't walk!" I would never say out loud in public, "Wow. That man is bald. He must have cancer. Poor thing." Surely if I went around town running my mouth like this, I would get attacked. Maybe shot. For some reason, the basic rules of common courtesy are thrown out the window when we take the boys out.
6. What really happens in a multiple pregnancy: Few realize the toll a triplet pregnancy takes on a woman's body (and mental health). Yes our bellies get much bigger. Our pregnancies are often void of joy. Very early on, many of us were asked to reduce or terminate our pregnancies.
Our pregnancies are huge emotional roller coasters. We worry daily if our babies will be born too prematurely. We worry about cord entanglement, twin to twin transfusion, intrauterine growth restriction, gestational diabetes, pre eclampsia, pre term labor, extreme prematurity, premature rupture of membranes, birth defects. . .the list could go on forever.
Most of us suffer the pain and heartache of having three babies in the NICU. We spend weeks, and sometimes months, on bed rest. We travel back and forth between our homes and the hospital trying to be a mommy to three babies living in two different places. We try to protect our preemies from RSV and other dangerous germs.
Our bodies struggle to function again. Our skin stretches beyond your imagination. We have stretch marks in places that we never knew possible. We have aches and pains that last for months (sometimes longer).
We cry because no one understands. We grieve over the pregnancy we didn't have. We have days filled with guilt because we feel like there just isn't enough Mommy to go around.
With time, love, and support we begin to heal. We learn to rejoice for the miracles we've been given.
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